As I sat here tonight, looking through my mile-long list of to-do's which can mostly only be done after the boys are asleep in their beds, I pondered tonight's review...
It all started last Friday, when I received a print-out from my boss {at my other job; my paying job}. He handed me a scanned, photo-copy of the May 1955 Housekeeping Monthly article, "The Good Wife's Guide". As I read the article, while we sat on our 8:30 am long, drawn-out weekly conference call with one of our bigger clients, I grew more and more appalled. This "has got to be a joke" I thought to myself! He glanced over at me from behind his computer monitor with a look of "pretty amazing, huh?" Some statements from "The Guide":
- Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
- Over the cooler months of the year, you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by... After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
- Listen to him.... Remember his topics of conversation are more important that yours.
- Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you.
- Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
- Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
- Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. He is the master of the house.... you have no right to question him.
- A good wife always knows her place.
Well moms, I think it's safe to say we've come a long way in 50 years. There are so many varieties of us these days, and I honestly don't think any of us fall into the "The Good Wife" kind... at least I hope not. A mother's life is crazier than it has ever been. We work, we play, we teach, we nurture, we feed, we volunteer, we live.... We're independent, yet we crave the love and support of our partners, parents & children. We have a very real need to keep our professional identity, yet we all long for days at home watching our children learn to walk & talk.
Many of us, like me, try to do it all! I work 30 hours per week at my salaried job, in energy consulting. On my off-days, which is 2 days a week, I am home all day, caring for the kids, carpooling to preschool, doing laundry, dishes, bathrooms & more. Errands need to be run, mouths need to be fed {constantly, I might add} & butts need wiping! After the bedtime routine is said and done for the night, I come downstairs to my night job. Baby reviews need to be written & my stationery proofs need to be submitted to clients. I respond to all the emails that have piled up in my inbox all day. And that is all before I even factor in my need for a social life, with girlfriends, outside of the house. Yes, my husband tends to suffer a bit... But I don't think I would change my life for the world. I truly believe I have the best of every world. I have a professional place to go, to interact with only adults on an intellectual level, every other day. I spend a ton of time with my children & I have the pleasure of watching them grow and learn new things daily. I have two hobbies that I truly love, and have found a way to make money doing what I love, with my new stationery business. I have a husband who loves me, and supports everything I do. He is a huge help around the house, and we share {almost} everything, 50/50.
So while we may not conform to the Housekeeping Monthly standards of a good wife anymore, we still need something to "guide" us a bit. Something to tell us that it is ok, and that we are not alone in the quest for wanting it all. Something to humor us a bit, maybe...

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